James B. " Jimmy " Doyle
My father Jim passed away from cancer in Nov 2006 - "The best man we've ever known."
Funeral:
-
The eulogy from the family at his funeral on November 9, 2006.
I. TD Intro -Good afternoon, my name is Tim Doyle and I am one of 7 kids of Jim and Muffy Doyle. - My mom, Muffy asked me to say a few words on behalf of the family for Dad - - - - who is known by a number of names - he was born Bernard James Doyle, which turned to James then to Jim then to Jimmy during his sports years and then, in the last 18 yrs to Poppi……
II. Heaven -
On Sunday, Poppi entered into the presence of God - - - as the Bible clearly states to be "absent from the body is to be present with the Lord." - Poppi is in the perfect place - - we know in Heaven there is no sorrow, no pain, no crying, no suffering, no disabilities, NO CANCER, NO WHEELCHAIRS ....and no death…… - Poppi is in a place of eternal joy - And - - oh the joy he's given us in his 78 yrs here on earth…
III. The greatest tragedy in life is not death but life w/out purpose -
And Poppi had a purpose…..
A. Early Life -
Poppi was born in 1928 - - and moved to Indpls when he was 4 yrs old He was educated at St Joan of Arc, Cathedral HS and Butler, and despite being second in his class at Cathedral he said he received his education in the bowling alley, the alley at 42nd and College and on 49th street.
B. Sports star -
As I look out over the audience, it's easy to guess that many of you remember the sports star Jimmy Doyle….. What a gifted athlete he was and what joy he brought so many people being an athlete - - - but you now, he never once mentioned to us that he even played sports. -
But he did tell his friends some stories - -
Like when he met his lifelong friend and roommate Buckshot Obrien at Butler - - and midway thru their junior year, dad noticed buckshot never took the ball out of bounds after an opponent's bucket…because once he in bounded the ball to Buckshot, dad never saw the ball again…. So, one time during a game, my dad refused to take the ball out - -- and Buckshot said, "take the ball out", "I'll give it back" - "scouts honor"….. So, dad inbounds the ball to buckshot and buckshot takes off dribbling down the court - - all my dad sees is his back…… So, dad and some opponents in green jerseys catch up to buckshot at half court - - and dad says "what are you doing????" and buckshot replies "I wasn't a boy scout" - - - well, the other team gets the ball and scores - - and Hinkle yells at buckshot to take the ball out - - - and he inbounds into dad and as dad is dribbling up the court, buckshot's yelling at the ref "he's traveling", "he's traveling…." Dad says "what are you doing - we're on the same team - - and buckshot replied - - "yeh, but you traveled" -
My dad used his athletic gifts to bring joy to people and to glorify God by using his gifts - - but he never used them to bring attention to himself…..Reading the Bible, I know of no case where Jesus purposely drew attention to Himself - - - and that reminds our family of dad - - - my father was the best example on earth of the true humility of Christ….
C. Business -
Dad chose not to play baseball or basketball at the pro level (for an extended period anyway) and he joined his father in the 2 man Company business - Doyle Furniture Co. Dad worked there for over 50 yrs up until he passed away. -
I ask you - how does a small 2 man operation provide for a family of 9, put 7 kids thru private high school and 7 kids thru college? The answer is Jim Doyle was an extremely gifted businessman and I'll safely assume most people here own some Doyle furniture or carpet - and we're very thankful for that. -
His sole employee and bookkeeper for almost 50 yrs was Ruth and dad asked her about a year ago if she needed anything and of course, she said no, and he said what about a raise - and she said no, thank you and he replied - you don't want a raise? And she responded, no, I gave myself one last month….. and dad responded how big was it and she said - - real big - - and he responded laughing, "you're fired!"….. -
The important part of the business is that it provided for the people that Poppi loved the most: -
In this life, Love must be our top priority, primary objective and our greatest ambition! Love is most important for 1 reason - - - because it is eternal. -
Perhaps Mother Theresa said it best when she said - - - "It's not what you do but how much love you put into it that truly matters" -
And Poppi understood this - - - because he truly loved…..
D. Family
Dad's parents - My dad's father also passed away from cancer when he was also 78 yrs old - - Of my dad's relationship with his dad, Jim once said "my dad and I had a great relationship - we never had a cross word or a misunderstanding of any kind - he was a wonderful man." Jim described his mom as "caring, loving and hardworking…."
E. His wife
, our mom, Muffy, was the absolute jewel of my father's life…... Married for over 51 yrs, they tried to live their lives on advice rec'd from Msgr Buchold when they were newly married in their late 20's: -
he said "Muffy is Slovenian and Jim, you're Irish - - that's a very bad combination…. - he said "you'll have disagreements; try not to be disagreeable" - "you know you love each other; understand you're not always going to like each other" - "and to you Irishman - - the best thing a father can do for his children is love their mother"
(Dad shared this same advice at Jenny and Chris's wedding)
And dad followed the advice because the last words mom said to dad - -- mom was on her knees by his bed in the hospice room, holding his hand she said, "you gave our lives such joy and made my life complete and always put me first in your life and treated me with respect."
F. His sister,
Aunt Jody and the whole Langsenkamp family - - - how much Poppi loved being with his sister Jody - - When Aunt Jody and my dad where together it was a perfect picture of how a brother and sister should treat each other - -the kindness, respect and love between them were so evident and an example for all of us to follow….
G. The kids - -
" As some of you are aware, we've had a lot of sickness in our family ; in fact 7 of the 9 in our family are or have been very sick and yet, this is the place that we've seen the most Christ-like characteristics in our dad: "
Poppi understood that "When trials and suffering comes into a person's life, it reveals what's truly in their hearts. And what was in my father's heart was true love for his children……. "
In a speech he gave to the Junto group he said regarding his kids:
"You start off praying "please God heal them" then after awhile you pray "please God give them acceptance and independence" later you pray "please God give us the strength to care for them" and then you pray "please God let us outlive them by one day"……
1. He and mom moved into Debby's house to help raise Erin and Katie and literally slept on the floor at nights…….
And God honored his sacrifice by developing a bond between he and Erin and Katie that will never be forgotten never be broken and will serve as an example to his granddaughters of how they must live their lives in self sacrificing service - - and by doing so, they will honor Poppi's memory.
H. The countless late night visits
to my house, Mack's house, Deb's house and to help provide for Jody - - to help in emergency after emergency after emergency - - almost daily or nightly……
I. When serving the family he never complained,
and always responded immediately - - for 51 years….
J. God used Poppi's sports career to prepare him for his life of service to his family
K. "True worship has less to do with offering sacrifices than with being a sacrifice ourselves.
L. To us, Poppi was the greatest of men…..
IV. Memories
Poppi created great times for us:
Marching around the house singing the "Butler war song" and seeing Poppi laughing and playing
The kids standing on the hearth of the fireplace singing and talking about Christmas the next day
The house mom and dad built on Cricklewood Rd. - - with the backyard ½ courts - for basketball/kickball/wiffle-ball/racing
The time Poppi became a hero: - When he saved Hughie Reynolds, a neighbor boy's life from a stampeding horse……. (tell story)
The times at Lake Wawasee:
Where he taught Debbie how to ski around the lake……and all of us to ski
How loud he was after diving into the water on his morning swims to the buoy
Slips n the water and creating games to play against the seawall and games like "flip"….
Weekends with the Langsenkamps
Hitting fly balls to Mack and Danny every night after dinner in the spring and summer
Then…..teaching Erin and Katie baseball
With Jody, Jamie and Jenny - - always making time to be with them and make them feel important - - Our most precious gift we can give someone is our time because we only have a set amount of it - - When we give our time, we sacrifice, which is the essence of love - he loved Jody, Jamie and Jenny…
"Nothing is stronger than gentleness." This was so evident to us in how he taught his 2 youngest grandchildren - Ellie and Hannah
Poppi's smile and laugh
His joy and thankfulness when everything was crashing down around him….and most would have crumbled….. Jim prayed…….every morning after dropping us off at Chatard for school - - he entered the chapel and prayed - - every morning - -
Poppi and Debby There was a special bond between Debby and dad - - and Debby called Poppi her best friend……
IV. Conclusion:
Despite our attempt to provide a full picture of who Jim is, God did not put us on this earth to be remembered or for even Jim to be remembered- but He put us here to prepare for eternity Because of this - - - God's goal for our lives on earth is not on our comfort, but that we grow up spiritually and become like Christ……So, God gives us our time on earth to build and strengthen our character for heaven - - and he does this thru trials and difficulties - -- and he gave Poppi 78 yrs…………
And Poppi learned what a pastor once said - "Suffering, with dignity, may enable you to mark more lives for Christ than anything else you say or do for Christ." "
How did Poppi respond so well to the suffering in his life ? Someone said - - - "The extreme greatness of Christianity lies in the fact that it does not seek a supernatural remedy for suffering, but a supernatural use for it."
Poppi's life showed us Jesus Christ.
The examples of Christ's
" Servanthood " Sacrifice " Gentleness " Meekness " Compassion " Thankfulness " Childlikeness " and Love, "
Poppi showed us all Jesus - and a higher compliment could never be given to any person
We love you Poppi, thank you for your life, you gave us all joy ; and we will surely see you soon…..
Thank you and God bless…..
Prayer Card - from the funeral on November 9, 2006
The "Junto" Group Memorial to Jim Doyle - a beautiful tribute!- Jim was a 16 year member of Junto Indianapolis where he served on the Board for 2 years. The Junto (meaning "meeting") was a club established in 1727 by Benjamin Franklin and continues to this day in certain cities. The purpose of Franklin's Junto was to debate questions of morals, politics, and natural philosophy, and to exchange knowledge of business affairs.
Hospice:
In his time in Hospice - - this is the song that we played to comfort my dad - - - (this link is a live performance of the song - absolutely beautiful! - Fernando Ortega - Sing to Jesus. This song is from the cd we played in dad's hospice room - - the album cover is pictured - - and is entitled The Shadow of Your Wings by Fernando Ortega.
Motto:
Who is a saint? - Poppi kept this poem at his desk in his office for over 50 yrs.
Because they were cheerful when it was difficult to be cheerful,Patient when it was difficult to be patient;
And because they pushed on when they wanted to stand still,
And kept silent when they wanted to talk,
And were agreeable when they wanted to be disagreeable.
That was all.
It was quite simple - and always will be.
- Unknown
Sports:
Butler University Hall of Fame - Baseball and basketball. Member: All Hoosier Classic Basketball Team. Won 8 Varsity Letters at Butler. Member: 1950 All American Basketball Team.
1993 Butler University Hall of Fame Induction booklet - Thank you Jerry Kilander for sending this booklet to me !Newspaper clipping - on the 1993 Butler University Hall of Fame Induction
Speeches:
To come......
Pictures:
To come......
